Have fun storming the castle!

As I orbit this 'Forbidden planet' Layla Zoe is pouring some acoustic bourbon in my ears with her powerful, smoky voice which cuts through the cobwebs like a warp engine and the memories come flooding through.


Firstly, Up-state New York: The last month brought our 'autumn'. I tried calling it 'Fall' and got that quizzical look from someone which lets you know their failing to understand? You see we don't have any trees here which lose their leaves and so the phrase is a non sequitur. Shame, I did miss the riot of colors and the scrunch of leaves. Which told you Halloween was coming and magic was near.

But, each place has it's way and here our temperature has remained mostly in the 70's with bright sunshine and just a few showers of rain. These drops of moisture have brought forth a carpet of beautiful flowers on the Rock. One a small delicate purple flower reminds me of my sweet Jean-Marie and our time here together. Lovers trying to escape their dead line by dancing in bed. I miss her sharp mind and lovely legs.

Next a memory of the workshop at Elmwood floats through. Especially a fracking table saw!!! Last week my new theatrical partner in crime 'George' and I were starting to build the set for the panto. The smell of sawdust, splinters in fingers and the fun as Mike Gnazzo used to say as you 'dope out a solution to a problem'. As much as George is a fine fellow. I still miss my hulking great friend Mike with whom no project seemed beyond us. Both of us working till we were exhausted, filthy and doing things we would normally only do for money and at the end proud and exhilarated by our efforts.

My preparations for playing the ' Grand old powdered man' are going well. The dramaturgy that one can do in the age of the Internet is astounding. I've watched clips of video him and literally peeked into his New York apartment. I've gathered information from all over the world. While ordering many of the books from the cottage industry which has set itself up to promote this stately homo. I've read the 'Naked cival servant' and found it just a blast. He is so easy to take in and makes you chuckle along no matter how dark the time of his life. I've also read a play by Tim Fountain using Q's words. He was trying to create a piece by which other actors could play him. So, I was interested and... it was bad! Really, bad!!! Good news though, I now have three gigs, two state side and one here in Gib before I go. Things are not good for gays here. Their too much under cover and homo-phobia is all about. So, I've offered to do the piece for our local gay and lesbians chapter and they've accepted. Stand by for moi to be called 'Queer' all over again! Won't be the first time and nothing like Mr. Crisp put up with.

In the last couple of weeks we've had a bunch of art things come through our little Rock. One was a show in the very grand Governor's house. We Gibraltarians still have someone sent over from England to preside over us and he gets to live in a truly beautiful building called the Covent. It was here that a play called 'It's not about heroes' was put on. It concern's two World war one poets and how they met. The play was sweet and full of poetry. But in the end the room it was done in was more interesting than the performance of the piece. These two 'guns for hire' though having good voices blunted the poetry with uninspired renditions. Otherwise the room was spectacular!

Something which was a lot of fun was the John Lennon drawings which we had on display. As some of you will know John and Yoko got married here in Gibraltar. Check out the 'Ballard of John and Yoko'. It was a lovely collection of his drawings and some hand written lyrics. Fab! Took me back in time and reminded me that today's artists have much to learn in style and purpose.

Lastly, we had an evening of remembrance at the Garrison library in which music and poems were performed for Veterans. I was asked to read and foolishly sent in a Bio of myself to get the Chairman off my back who insisted he needed something to introduce me. I performed my bit and all went well. It was nice to be in front of a crowd and hear my voice working again. Then when all the other people were done we had an intermission and I became a source of interest. Two women approached me (not that kind of approach! I wish it were.) to see if I could hook them up with people in 'Hollywood'. One was seeking funding for a "fabulous film project (a Costume period piece)". For which she had sold the option for to some far away agent in the land of the free. The other was seeking resources for 'her daughter to make a film here when she came to the rock'. To both I was polite and then when they'd left I laughed. Lastly on the dangers of letting your resume get out is that the woman who'd put on that play in the Governors house? Now wanted my opinion because I had been a professional actor and had a career. She insisted! I was truthful. I'm sure she'll steer clear of me now. Anyway, write and let me know how YOU are and I miss and love you all. Andrew

“Death by misadventure? Yeah, I've had a few birthdays like that!"

USS Cocteau: NCC -1957. Captain Andrew Dark
(There are plenty of links to click. Enjoy and I miss you all!)

It's been some fast times here in 2009. The Months shredding away from the calender like toilet paper. Since we last spoke a hot humid August has rolled on by leaving in it's wake the first days of September and my 52nd birthday, Sunday the sixth. So, have a tipple on me.

I'm sitting at my desk 'chillin', feeling peaceful. Drinking down some liquid smoke. It's around midnight and Dinah Washington's sultry voice croons in my headphones. The sassy, sexy horns remind me of dancing (all those years ago) with my beautiful Lois in a New Orleans funeral. Our Creole excursion full of all the southern comforts of Bourbon, Voodoo and love. Outside my bedroom window a lush moon is spilling it's light across the Bay and a sweet senorita of a breeze blows in from Spain. Her cooling breath gently sways the plants and blows across my naked shoulders. A little shudder of things to come perhaps? I'll cast some runes.

I'm on vacation for a few days relaxing, catching up with art and working on some words to send back to you. As always I wonder what to write? After all, a lot goes on in a month but most of it unworthy of posting. I'm not one to change my status on Facebook just because the wind has. What a break through? A technology which allows us to share the minutia of moments which a few years ago we would have been happy to go through alone. But, I'd better be careful it's late and we're getting close to that scary hour when 'ideas become concept's.

On the Art side:

I'm designing a Pantomime (kid's show) and it's 'Alice in Wonderland.' So, I spent a lovely hour today rooting around in our theatre workshop. Smelling the sawdust and looking over the bits and pieces. It was fun to see all the previous shows laying around as props or flats. As my mind was spinning out some new ways to use old stuff my buddy Bob Olsen came to mind. He was the Master. “A bit of fresh paint here and a little nip and tuck there! And we have it!” Of course, it was never that simple! The panto will help to jump start my mind. I need it, since any ideas of acting this year went out the window. Ho-hum!!!

To combat those blues and to celebrate the old curmudgeon! I am looking to perform 'An evening with Quintin Crisp' next year in the USA when I come and visit. It is a fun one man show and I think Mr. Olsen would have appreciated it. So, watch this space for updates. You all have a great month and we'll speak soon. Love and peace Andrew Dark

Burying a rock!

(This ones full of songs and vids so take the time to click and enjoy!)

Hi guys,
Sorry for not writing more often but even though it's been quite a while since my run in with my 'Appendicitis'. It has taken much longer to re-coup my mojo. This stems from the fact that the show I was going to perform has now been permanently shelved'. It must seem silly to civilians but I found myself deeply depressed. Those who know me are familiar with my Jim Kirk fixation at not believing in the 'Kobayashi Maru' but the more I tried to put this 'Turkey' on the more it went to hell! It had been three months following in the foot steps of Sisyphus pushing his boulder up and down those freaking hills in the Greek Underworld. Every time I thought I had it sorted out and was approaching the summit. The freaking rock would get away from me and roll to the bottom again. So, I buried the boulder in the cat pan and have been licking my wounds ever since.
Anyway, I'm feeling much better and am sitting on a lovely old leather couch in my newly decorated bedroom. The walls are starting to look like mine as the sci-fi posters begin to cover up the plain ivory white paint. It's hard to give up your own apartment full of stuff and travel back home with only a suitcase of possessions into a single room. But with time you gather new pieces and start again. The sun is streaming in and we are in the midst of a hot, sticky summer day. It took a while for the temperature to stabilize but now we've settled into a bake cycle of humid high 80's and 90's.
I've just taken my aunt and Mom out to eat at one of my favorite spots. It's called 'Cheers' after the TV show but there the comparisons stop. There are no eccentric regular drunks or humorous bar tenders. Instead it's owned by locals and the food is mostly Spanish fare served quickly and hot. While Mom and auntie swapped gossip about various members of the family. I read our local newspaper 'The Gibraltar Chronicle'. It's not much to peruse and everyone says so, but buy one and those same people borrow yours and have a peek . The city around us was humming with activity as Gibraltar settles into it's summer routine of tourists washing up upon our shores from the cruise ships and coaches. Whom then rush around attempting to soak in the magic of Gib in just a few short hours. Locals in their shorts and summer dresses take this influx of people in their stride and use the side streets to avoid the crush of humanity on our Main ave. While cars and motorcycles clog the roads due to Government's insistence on scheduling major roadworks at exactly the wrong time. I smile at the proof that bureaucracy like everything else is international! As I'm paying up the sounds of Micheal Jackson's 'Billie Jean' pump out from a passing car and once again for a few more moments the Black Orpheus lives. We in Gibraltar have been affected by his death though running a few notches shy of Australia who've been (according to Internet sources) literally killing themselves to join him walking on the moon. Speaking of which I'm looking up at my brand new poster of Buzz Aldrin on the lunar surface and remembering that wonderful moment when America meant something good to us all. Have a wonderful fourth and much love. Miss you all Andrew Dark

Bob has left the building.

Since the sad news of Bob's exit I have of course thought much of him. He would have loved the panoramic view from my cable car as it goes up and down over the lush vegetation of the Rock of Gibraltar. From here you can see the rugged coast line of Africa a mere 15 miles away across the blue, blue waters of the Straits and the majestic Moroccan mountains peaking up above the icing of white clouds. Of course, he would've rearranged the clouds, re-drawn the coast line as it suited him and had to fudge the perspective a little to get it to work on the back wall of Elmwood. But, I would have loved the chance to work one last earth bound project with him. Before he moved onto exclusively celestial designs and beyond my ability to turn up for construction. And that's how I have remembered Bob 'working on projects' and the many friends I met doing so.


The loyal family of workers who came and went through the years helping our very own Don Quixote tilt the wind mills and chase his dreams. Of all his works 'Man de la Mancha' was the one most quoted and it's where I leave you now. Miss you Bob.

Your little Brother Andrew Dark.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGzqbEeVWhs&feature=related

To dream the impossible dream,
To fight the unbeatable foe,
To bear with unbearable sorrow
To run where the brave dare not go;
To right the unrightable wrong.

To love, pure and chaste, from afar,
To try, when your arms are too weary,
To reach the unreachable star!

This is my Quest to follow that star,
No matter how hopeless, no matter how far,
To fight for the right
Without question or pause,
To be willing to march into hell
For a heavenly cause!

And I know, if I'll only be true
To this glorious Quest,
That my heart will lie peaceful and calm
When I'm laid to my rest.

And the world will be better for this,
That one man, scorned and covered with scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of courage,
To reach the unreachable stars!

“Overture and beginners...not you Mr. Dark.”

Hi folks, I'm back in the center seat of 'The Cocteau' and I wanted to send out a short note that's not a 'Tweet' but rather an Email with the delusion of being on paper. I am well, although there are parts of me no longer aboard. It would seem my posting on Facebook about something Alien in my body was not so space happy as I thought. A week ago, I was walking home from rehs and the sharp pain in my side which I had (like a dutiful American) been ignoring for five days got too much. In the hopes of getting some medicine to ease whatever was burrowing it's way through me. My friend Eleri pushed me towards the Emergency room at the hospital reminding me that 'it was the done thing in Gibraltar to seek medical help when you felt like some creature was chewing your insides up'. I resigned myself and went in... I hate hospitals!
After a bit of a wait since it was Saturday night and already the ER was busy dealing with an elderly lady dying and the first of the red soaked drunks coming in. I saw a Doctor and he took some blood to have labs run on. It wasn't too long before the Doctor returned and told me 'I was going nowhere'. I said, “But I have a show we're doing this week. In fact we're moving all the stuff in tomorrow for tech day!!!” He said, 'Well, it's up to you but I think your life is more important!' I asked for a few moments to get my head around things. Then followed the dumbest ten minutes of my life as I literally considered whether or not I should go through with the freaking show and then seek treatment. I know it must seem weird to you my non-theatre friends but I can see those of you who share my rare obsession nodding your heads in understanding. For I have never failed to appear on stage in thirty years and have even taken to the boards as my apartment was being side swiped by the vestiges of a hurricane and water was literally washing my world away. Anyway, the moments of madness passed and of course I did have myself admitted and the diagnosis of acute appendicitis brought me to surgery. As the Surgeon was talking to me about the operation and where they would cut. I jokingly asked him if he could fix my hernia as he went in? He looked back seriously and answered, “Good idea...we'll do that!” My jaw hit the floor. I was in a place where health did matter. My adventures continued like a soap opera plot and I found myself in ICU for two days being watched over by nursing staff. Since my neck's inability to bend had caused problems for the 'Anesthesiologist' and I had absorbed so much 'sleepy stuff'. So, to protect my throat and vocal cords I was kept knocked out. Anyway, as I said at the start. I am well and now back home in front of the computers working on being better. The show will be done at a later date and I am thankful in many ways for being here. For I know back home in the States I would have just kept waiting and most probably would've died. I miss you all and will see you soon as I can. Love and peace Andrew Dark...

Xmas Cheer

Sent by John Whitley

Hi there, and a happy holidays to all. Right now, I'm listening to Glenn Miller's band playing 'Jingle Bells' from a mix I made for my last show.

Christmas is almost upon us and here in Gib we're like many folks in the western world. Our Main street has been full of locals spending money we're not sure will be there by next month. Maybe it's smarter that way? It sure gets the lumps out of the mattress. We've also had an influx of Spanish as they find themselves with a better exchange rate as the pound collapses. It would seem that the English followed the USA model of 'Greed and business' a little too closely.

Sent by Ann Trudell

Gib celebrates Xmas big here I've been to two separate parties paid for by our bosses. A formal dinner dance (dress in a suit) type for which they laid on coaches and took us into Spain. Then a more casual lunch which was in town. Then us guys at work are heading out to eat some lunch on the 31^st. It does my spirit good but my heart bad I'll be climbing on the 'Weight train' next month! That's if I can run and catch it.

Sent by Heather Sabella
Photo shopped by me!

Though everyone here has been complaining that its been the coldest winter ever. We've had some beautiful days. At the top of the Rock we had golden sunshine pouring down and warming us. At one point I had five apes laying around where the cable car comes in sunning themselves. I know it's been different for you. Mark Marshall just web cammed me and I saw the snow you guys have been getting. I love each and everyone of you but I am so glad I don't have snow in my weather pattern. I had to smile when a month ago all of Gibraltar was running around excited and snapping digital pictures of large hail stones. Some people even made diminutive snowmen from the ice. Could 'Jack Frost' have been hiding in my suitcase all this time? Besides these visitors from a higher altitude we've also had some extremely powerful storms come along and pound our little Rock. Just a couple of months ago another ship was sent to the bottom of the sea. Here's some video shot by a local reporter where you can see this large ship being pounded by the sea. I keep seeing a huge watery hand breaking it in two.

So, I did the Xmas show at the historical/hysterical Garrison library which is a truly wonderful building. Several hundred years old, chock full of ancient books and atmosphere. The room we performed in was pure unadulterated Victorian magic with it's tall, tall ceilings and two large fire places. The evening I had designed was 'Christmas in Gibraltar 1945': An hour long radio show broken up by a choir thirty-five strong who sang many lovely Xmas hymns and songs. The material and jokes for the show were borrowed from radio broadcasts during WW2. Now, as you know I'm not usually up for Xmas till...well...December and then not until Xmas week. So, this was very odd for me. I had been collecting radio shows & Xmas music for months. Standing in shorts on a 90 degree day during July pouring over newspapers and soldiers magazines from the period. Looking for mentions of what they were doing to celebrate Christmas and how was daily life? I listened to the radio shows and music over the months and slowly a plan came into form. Nothing written down but I was working on it. Then two weeks before the show my computer coughed up a blue screen which I did not like the look of and made me unsure I could keep it working. It was then that I decided to buy a new machine. Since all the sound files which I was going to to transcribe from were on the hard drive and the thing I was going to write with was the computer.

I found one at a good price and made the purchase. My new set up is faster and smarter than the older. I wish I were too. Days followed battling the new machine as I learnt just how fussy Vista was going to be. But...by the end I got the computers up and the script was written in just two days leaving me in a haze but with a plan called 'B'.

Now, as far as the show? It was like trying to herd cats. Too many lovely, smiling people telling me I was in charge and then constantly reminding me that we couldn't do things that way. I was grateful for the input but tired of the game plan. I was the new kid on the block with no real idea of the shape of the evening but by all accounts a good time was had by all. It was two sold out houses filled to the rafters with plenty f extra seats and fire codes thrown to the wind. We raised close to 1,500 dollars for the RAF benevolent fund and we made more money this year than others.

So, onto the next thing which in my case is cramming my lines for the pantomime and assuming the role of 'Cringe' one of the footmen to the 'Evil Count de Cash'. Not too demanding and something I won't repeat. The director has a habit of not running any of the moments or lines more than once. Therefore no-one can remember much and cares even less. She then gets angry because of this. I know you can see my smile.

I also went and saw my doctor here to get an appointment with an orthopaedic surgeon a few months down the road. It will be worth the wait to have him look at my body and send me for a scan. Perhaps, I can get my knee sorted out. It gives me much grief! But mostly I am well and looking forward to putting this year behind us. Art wise I feel a little cramped. I miss my familiar actors and the quality, humor and understanding they brought to these projects.

But, enough... I found this fun item posted on Yahoo about the New President elect...

Made me smile... I love and miss you so much and shall be thinking of you all through the holidays. Your friend always Andrew Dark

Judy Garland: Merry Xmas (My current fav)

The end of days.. Heratics & Lipstick

So, what's it all about?

You know the meaning of life? (Song)

Sorry folks... that I've not been writing much in my blog but I needed to work on a few things before the apocalypse comes. As you all know by now the media has informed us that “the end is nigh”. So, I have been busy catching up with a few soul absolving tasks. Isn't it funny? But since, the “Market Meltdown” and the 'Presidential debates' saying my prayers and cleaning out the basement for a bomb shelter seem vitally important. It only seems like a few days ago when the American people exerted some political opinion and expressed angst to the houses of Congress and Senate about the bailout and how it was rewarding the people who'd broken the economy. Oh, how foolish we were believing in Democracy. We had no understanding of how bent the universe is! For the money market gods of Mammon looked down from Wall street and they were angry. In a mighty tantrum they tore down the temple and plunged the numbers into the toilet. For we were doubting that they had done the right thing? We were questioning their motives? Didn't we understand that it wasn't the people running these companies who'd done something wrong? No, it was the E.S.S. (Evil European Scientists) who had played the Large Hadron Collider RAP (song) so loud that it had torn a hole in the financial space time credit continuum of the global economy with their hip-hop. Allowing a Recessional Black hole to connect to our universe and suck out the value of everything as we know it. This is what had caused Main street to wink out. The people to be swept away... Leaving only these brave Captains of Industry to sail upon the sea of paltry billions (we had given them) so they may create the world in their image anew. Give me a break...hang the bastards!

Please, take the time and hug yourself. I offer a few songs and things to reassure you. Keep your chin up and your smile wide. Put on some lipstick and make yourself feel like a billion Dollars! The world is not over. Miss ya Love Andrew Dark.

A Dark Painting:

Unger Report:Making the most of a bad bussiness (Radio humor)

But I like Palin! This guy would be a wonderful VP (Classic Python)

Give me a call on the Banana phone: (Song)